Wednesday, April 25, 2012

3KCBWWC--In Which I Invoke My Wildcard Privileges and Craft My Ideal Day

It starts off like this:

Me spinning on the dock during a vacation; I always bring a spindle
because they pack better than my wheel does.

Dock, water, sunshine, cool breeze, a favorite spindle and, even though you can't see them in this picture, the rest of my family hanging out nearby fishing, drawing, reading and telling each other how nice it is to take a break from the TV and computer.  Also, the fiber would be a fabulous color and would draft easily and spin up into the ideal springy and even worsted weight yarn.

A little later a select few of my friends--along with some new and interesting people that they brought with them to liven up the party-- would show up with their knitting baskets, a picnic lunch, some tasty snacks, a manicurist, and a masseuse.  We would settle our backsides into the very comfy adirondack chairs arrayed on the covered porch, put our feet up, and while away the afternoon with knitting, munching, and chit chat.  Periodically, one of us could take a break from all the fun and enjoy a quick massage or some nail work.  The manicurist would do such a good job smoothing away the rough spots on our hands that we could all start working with silk and never need to complain about it snagging on us.  Plus, the nail polish would dry instantly--no wasted knitting time here-- and not chip for at least two weeks.

Later in the afternoon, the mail would be delivered by a postal worker who also delivers ice cream right to the porch.  In the mail would be a shipment from the Way Cool Fiber of the Month club, which I forgot I signed up for, and an envelope full of Instant Teleport tickets to see the ellen show.  When we got there, it would be a special ellen show dedicated to how cool knitting and spinning are.  We would win lots of prizes, just like the audience always does, but  they would all be knitting and spinning related and  even if I didn't get the biggest prize, because that would be selfish, I might get the second or third biggest prize because it is my ideal day, after all, and who doesn't love winning a prize?

See, here's a prize.  I won it just the other day, which was really fun.
My prize might even be a Schacht Sidekick wheel, which I would never buy for myself but which I'm sure I would enjoy receiving for free, and since they fold for travel, I might be able to start bringing it on vacations so that it wouldn't have to be just me and my spindle on a the dock, even though that's really fun and relaxing too.  One of my other prizes might be an all expense paid trip to a knitting and spinning retreat where my new wheel would really come in handy.

After the show, I would go home to find that my husband had made a gourmet dinner and that my kids had cleaned up the house and were really looking forward to washing the dinner dishes.  We would all settle down to watch some TV together, and everyone would agree that what they really wanted to watch was a period movie set in England and no one would change the channel on a commercial, get distracted by The Game,  and "forget" to change it back.  During this time, I would finish at least one major project and instead of teasing me because I seem to knit all the time, my family would marvel at my skill and my daughter would tell me that all of her friends thought it was so cool that her mom could knit.

Just before bed, I would weigh myself and discover that I had finally lost those last five (ok, 15) pounds of baby weight.  I would also have grown and inch or too--just enough that my daughters can no longer call me "shorty" or "shrimp"  or "mini-mom."  And when I looked in the mirror I would discover that my hair had developed exactly the amount of wave/curl that I always thought it needed.  The few streaks of silver would still be there though, because I earned them and there's not that many of them anyway.

I probably wouldn't want to go to sleep because who wants a day like this to end, but eventually --after a few more (mistake free!) rows on my next project-- I would drift off and I could relive the whole perfect day in my dreams.

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